Here as we approach the end of the year, the end of our Powerhouse Entrepreneur Program – even the end of a life chapter for many of us – a special gift you can give yourself this time of year is tune into how you “do endings.”

I once had a colleague who warned me upfront that the way she does endings is to ‘burn down the whole bridge while slamming the door on her way out.’ It was surprising information at the time, given the grounded, loving woman I knew at the time… but I *wasn’t* surprised when that’s exactly how she ended our professional relationship the next year.

Endings make people do WEIRD SHIT.

Sometimes it can make us swing in polar opposite directions from one second to the next… one second we are feeling sad, desperate, clingy, and try to seek ways to stay needed by the ones we care about… and the next, we ‘walk away’ (dramatically for some of us, or others like that Homer Simpson gift where you just disappear in plain sight) before we can get hurt or disappointed.

I’ve observed four different kinds of ‘exit strategies’ during my thousands of hours of coaching… and what those people might consider practicing if they want to try something different this time around.

Which one are you?


Disappear Homer Simpson GIF

Signs this is you:

We’ve probably all been this way at some ending or another. We run out of gas before the end, and instead of finding ways to fuel back up and cross the bridge to the other side with support, well-being, and commitment, we just sorta melt into a puddle or disappear in plain sight.

It’s ok, there’s no judgment here.

There’s just power in awareness.

So what to do if this is you?

Here’s what I’d suggest:


Terry Crews Nbc GIF by Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Signs this is you:

I was *this* close to choosing a gif of the Scrooge from A Christmas Carol, given the time of year we’re in…

This type of “doing endings” occurs when your feelings have been stacking and stacking and stacking without much real release. You may have started out as the first type – overwhelmed, stressed, big feelings inside – but you chose to power through. Sometimes this is necessary in life, but we must also recognize there are ripple effects from this choice. And unfortunately, most often we turn those consequences on ourselves.

If you find yourself in a cycle of blame-gaming – beating yourself up or wanting to point fingers at others for stuff that’s not going right – then take the cue and put these on your to-do list this week.

Priorities list:


Busy Work Work Work GIF by funk

Signs this is you:

Hello there, my dear Givers and Martyrs. It’s lovely to see you here, slowing down for a moment for yourself.

Remember that sense of spaciousness and serenity you’ve said you want, but somehow keep finding a way to clutter your time and energy?

You are the type of person who makes magic happen when you have the space to get creative, find your joy, and move and meditate. 

You’ve been riding out the fuel you stored up earlier this fall, knowing this time of year would be busy for you… and although things may be “fine” right now, your gas light is moments from turning on and you’re MILES from a gas station. 

It feels comforting to stay in motion, because slowing down might mean you come to a full stop. But remember, life doesn’t exist in black and white. Slowing down doesn’t mean you lose all your momentum. In fact, as counterintuitive as it sounds, it’ll probably help you speed up in the end.

So what should you implement?

Here’s where I’d start.


The Big Lebowski Whatever GIF

Signs this is you:

First of all, hi friend. I’m sorry you’re feeling shitty. I have completely been here, and you are not at all alone in this experience.

Burnout is a unique circumstance, especially when coupled with depression.

The name of the game here is Grace.

Bullying yourself into anything isn’t going to help. It may get a few more things done, but it’s only going to make the hole deeper to climb out of if you don’t address it sooner rather than later.

That’s not to say you need to black-and-white things between fully-on and fully-off. Maybe you can practice operating inside your responsibilities at 30%, and reserve the rest of your energy for nourishment, fun, and relaxation until you feel like you have more to give. And even then, you can raise the gradient by 5-10% at a time… nothing extreme is needed here. You’re just looking to find the sweet spot where what you are pouring into your own cup doesn’t immediately get fully dumped into what you’re giving to others or your work.

So here’s where I’d start:

Whether you’re ending this year Hiding in Plain Sight, in Self-Hate Central, Too Busy to Feel, or fully in Fuck It, just know that what you’re experiencing is the normalest of normal.

Everyone has weird stuff show up when we approach endings, especially year-ends. Not to mention, for many of us this is winter and our intake of sunshine, fresh air, and exercise has been impacted by our environment… so our bodies and minds get tangled into a bit of a knot.

I hope that, firstly, this new awareness you gain about yourself gives you something to notice moving forward, since awareness is the first step to changing any pattern. And secondly, I hope these suggestions give you an empowering place to start breaking that pattern and coming back to center.