What's your "DEAL" with money?
I’m fairly convinced that at some point in our young adult lives, we all develop what I call “money-itis.”
We catch some bug that someone gave to us along the way, it grows and festers, and sooner or later infects all our thoughts and feelings about money for years and years to come.
There’s always SOMEONE who infected you first, am I right?
“Dad always argued with the waiters every time we went out to eat because of some expired coupon they no longer accepted, but he insisted they honor because he wanted to save $3 from our meal. I always got a sour stomach at the end of meals out because of it, and still hate eating out to this day.”
“Mom always took me on retail therapy when I got dumped, got a bad grade, or had a really bad day. I learned to spend money when I’m sad -- and then later on, to feel massively guilty right after because I blew my budget every month.”
“My roommate would keep a spreadsheet of every single penny spent on the apartment and send me an invoice at the end of every month. She lived across the hall from me, and she sent. me. an. INVOICE. We are no longer friends.”
Who is that person -- or those people -- who taught you about the evils of money?
For me, it was almost a recreational activity to suffer over money.
There was never enough - it was constant drama, scarcity, worry.
So I SAVED. Every penny from every paycheck went into my bank account, like one of those dungeons with 7 deadbolts, a secret password, and a riddle to solve. I kept track of my bank balance, expenses, debts, and loans like it was an addiction.
And you know what?
I was the first person in my friend group to buy my own car.
I paid for my own first young artist program from my savings.
I started my retirement account at age 22.
And you know what else?
I made myself physically ill from stress over money.
I sabotaged dozens of friendships because of my tit-for-tat score keeping.
I said no countless times to experiences, gifts, clothes, foods, and things I wanted that would have greatly enriched my life because of my fear and pain about money.
What if I were to tell you that what you “believe” about money is actually an entirely made-up story?
I would assert that any story that has you
… counting pennies like Gollum and his Precious
… drinking wine to gain some “liquid courage” to check your bank account
… calling your bank to reset your password because you haven’t checked your account in so long that you have no f*ing clue what your login is
… sending Venmo requests to friends for $2
… impulse buying on Amazon when 3 rejection letters come all at once, and you have HAD it
… getting stomach aches at meals out because you’re agonizing over how the bill will be split
… paying more in overdraw fees than you do on your weekly groceries
… or just about ANY disempowering experience you’ve EVER experienced because of money...
… is a symptom of your money-itis.
The good news? It’s curable.
Money is a relationship, just like any other. And it’s often one that drives up our innermost fears and worries about our self-worth, our value, our success -- and creates some unhealthy thoughts and habits.
But money is currency, and currency is E N E R G Y .
You can be a beacon for and conduit of *negative* energy around money.
And you can be a beacon for and conduit of *positive* energy around money.
It’s always a choice.
And, I won’t lie -- it’s a choice that requires choosing and RE-choosing every day. Because I work with clients who have six figures in the bank who you’d think have pennies to their name, live in constant fear, and demand everything be split exactly 50/50. And I work with clients who have negative balances in their bank accounts but spend money like it’s sand leaking from a hole in their pocket.
It’s never about how much you actually have, make, or spend -- it’s about your relationship with it.
So what’s YOUR deal?
What’s the story at the core of your relationship?
What’s not possible in your life because of money?
What’s it costing your life?
As always, my dears, if this pushed your buttons and got your noggin spinning in all kinds of directions, book a sample call with me and we can not only uncover your story, but name a new one!
Because if this story is all made up, and this money-itis is a treatable bug (not some malignant, incurable disease) -- why not stop the suffering and make up a story that actually serves you?
Just a thought.
Your choice. :)
Love you, sweet souls. You are all divine vessels of love and beauty. And wherever you are in your journey is perfect.
To Wildly Abundant Money-Love,